Wednesday, May 28, 2014

My Writing - First Impressions

This is a little piece I had to write for a course, I'm taking at the moment from this site --

Lesson 1.
Your feedback and critique is welcomed :) 
"Beautiful day, isn't it, ma'am?”
Cassy turned her head to see a bright faced young girl standing by her, “It is a beautiful day.” she answered.
“So what will it be... Ma'am?” asked the waitress, as she tapped her pen on the side of her notepad.
“Oh, sorry I've been busy looking at all the buildings and the hustle and bustle of this adorable street, to look at the menu.”
“No worries ma'am.”
Bending her head, Cassy absent-mindedly twirled her hair with her fingers, as she quickly browsed the menu. Everything looked delicious, making her already hungry stomach, grumble in protest, “Hmm... The choices are quite delightful,” Cassy scanned the menu once again, “Gosh, I don't know which one to choose, what are some of the best ones?”
With her bright young eyes and an innocent smile, Betsy answered, “Well, ma'am, we've got the blueberry streusel pie, which rather scrumptious, there's chocolate chip mousse pie; which is j-ust the best, then we have apple raisin pie and our famous cherry pie.”
Glancing up at the waitress, Cassy smiled back, “Oh my, they all sound divine but... I think I'll go with the chocolate chip mousse pie. Chocolate is my one weakness.”
Betsy giggled, “And would you like something to drink with that?”
“Iced sweet tea, thank you.”
“I'll be right back with that for ya ma'am.” And with a swift twist and twirl on her cowboy boots, Betsy clip – clopped away.
Cassy leaned back in her chair, closed her eyes for a minute and let out a big sigh. She'd finally made it to Nashville, home of the Country Music Hall of Fame and Museum. Cassy couldn't contain her excitement as her eyes gazed upon the largest collection of country music, artifacts in the world, and when she saw the dazzling rhinestone costumes, a giggle escaped her lips as thoughts of the time her sister and she, had made their own cowgirl outfits using a be-dazzler kit that Cassy received as a birthday gift. When she stood in front of a large glass case and read the 'tear stained lyric sheets', a tear or two trickled down her cheek. But the best part of her day was when she stood inside the famous RCA Studio B, where many of the greats had recorded there, even Elvis had recorded well over 200 of his songs at the studio, many of which Cassy loved to sing along to her mothers records and to top off that moment, she'd asked a tourist to take her picture of her standing outside, with a wish in her heart, that maybe one day she'd get to record one of her songs there too.
Betsy set the plate down with a clank on the bistro table, “Here you are, ma'am. You're gonna enjoy every piece.” She then set down the iced sweet tea.
“Oh my... It looks so good and it's quite a large piece of pie.”
“It sure is ma'am.” Betsy did that little twirl thing again and trotted away.
Cassy looked the pie... The huge slice of pie! She sunk her fork into the mousse, pulling off a thick piece, then slipped it into her mouth. Rolling her eyes and a low 'Mmm', she savored her first taste of the chocolate chip mousse pie. It was creamy, light and very decadent and against her better thoughts, she couldn't resist eating the whole slice. The iced tea was the best accompaniment and as she sipped on the tea, she jotted down some thoughts in her leather bound notebook.
Sitting slightly behind and across from Cassy, sat a scruffy and disheveled man.   From when Cassy had walked down the street and sat down at the bistro table, Reid couldn't keep his eyes off her. She was the most beautiful woman he'd seen and he'd seen his fair share. And while he ate his slice of cherry pie and a cold root beer, he couldn't help but admire her. With her flowing red hair and freckles that dotted her face and a figure that wasn't stick thin, but a shapely size 6, he guessed. Cassy had been so caught up in snapping pictures and watching huge trucks drive by, people going about their business, and tourists who would point and say, “Oh, look that's so cute” or ''Wow, look at that', then snap a quick picture and move on. She'd been completely unaware of Reid sitting there, watching her.
His day had not been the easiest of days, actually he'd been up all night acting in a music video and had been on his way home, when he'd decided to stop at his favorite cafe bistro and get some famous cherry pie for his breakfast / lunch. While eating his pie, and chugging down his drink, Reid had mulled over in his head of whether or not to go and speak to Cassy, but little doubts crept in. He knew he wasn't the best looking guy on the block or town and especially now – he knew, he looked a mess. But he knew that his quiet charm and a great humble personality, that of which had landed him the job in the latest video shoot, might give him a slight shot. He kept thinking to himself, I'll never get a chance like this again.
So he took the last swig of his drink, pushed back on his chair, stood, straightened his plaid shirt and walked towards Cassy. With a quick clearing of his throat, he stopped next to Cassy's table, “Hello there ma'am.” Reid smiled.
Cassy's head hung low, engrossed with scribbling words in her notebook and was a little startled at the voice next to her. She peered up, “Oh, um... Hello.” her eyes widened.
“Beautiful day, isn't it.”
A little puzzled as to why this guy and an unkempt, dirty, grubby bearded guy at that, was standing at her side, trying to strike up a conversation with her, Cassy snapped, “Yes, it's a beautiful day.”
Reid stood mesmerized by her features. Being this close to her he could see her cute freckles and blue eyes. Eyes that looked back at him. With an unsure and concerned look, a look he should of expected.
“Sorry to interrupt you, but I was wondering if I....” out of the blue, Reid's mouth felt dry and rough just like sandpaper.
With her eyebrows raised, “Wondering what?” asked Cassy.
Reid glanced down, shuffled his boots on the ground. And mumbled to himself, “get it together man.” He looked up and straight into Cassy's big blue eyes, “I was wondering if, I may sit with you for a little while?”
Her shocked expression said it all, “You want to what?”
With the biggest smile he could muster, Reid answered, “I would love to sit with you for a while and buy you another glass of iced sweet tea, and maybe another slice of pie?”
Cassy was speechless.
She tapped her pen on her notebook, as her thoughts ran a muck, who does this guy, think he is? Do I have a big sign over my head saying, easy target or something? Cassy looked at Reid standing there in front of her, his hands half jammed into his torn pockets, dirt and grimed laden pants, her thoughts only got worse, and a gosh awful blueish plaid shirt. Oh, my, that disgusting beard and he had the nerve to ask to sit with her buy her tea... Iced sweet tea at that, and pie!
Reid began to doubt himself, this was a bad idea, she thinks I'm some kind of homeless hobo or by the look on her face something worse! And seeing that she didn't know what to say Reid blurted out, “I promise not to bite.” then as a final silly gesture, he placed his hands together as if he was ready to say a prayer.
And with that, Cassy just burst out laughing.
It was no use, this guy who in all circumstances, should be hosed down, scrubbed with a sweeping brush and a receive a total makeover, asked to spend a little time with her. HER! A somewhat shy freckled faced, redhead who had traveled miles to get here. With her fathers stern words of her amounting to nothing and that she would never be welcome back home', as she walked out the door. She swore she'd never be as mean as her father had been. She promised herself and her sweet dead mother – that she would do something good with her life. As those thoughts of her mother came to her mind, so did a saying she'd always preach to Cassy, “Cassy darling, we should never judge a book by its cover.” Then who is she, a lowly farm girl to be so mean and not allow this guy to spend time with her.
She finally stopped laughing and looked at Reid, “Well then, how can I refuse an offer like that.”
Reid sighed, “Why, thank you ma'am. I sure do appreciate your kindness.” He pulled the chair out and sat down.
“Just for the record, I'm not, ma'am – I'm Cassy.”
Reaching his hand across the table, Reid smiled and said, “I'm pleased to meet you, Cassy. I'm Reid Tennyson. Now how about we order another slice of pie.”

Copyright 2014 Freckles. All Rights Reserved.

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